Sex on the beach, Molested at the Sea

Fancy a Sex On The Beach? Be careful not to get Molested At The Sea, Violated On The Land, Sleazed at The Cabaret.

Pam*, 22, was posted to Thailand for work. Although she stayed outside of Bangkok, she frequented the bustling city on her off days to shop and unwind. She was having a lot of fun in her time in Thailand, even picking up conversational Thai. 3 months into work, her family came to visit one weekend. She showed them around Bangkok. She brought them to a massage parlour. Everything went fine, despite that her masseuse was male. She returned the next day for another massage. The same masseuse attended to her. Halfway during the session, he offered her a cup of herbal tea. Usually, the tea is offered after the massage. Not thinking that anything was amiss, Pam accepted the drink.

I wished Pam never had to tell me she was drugged and raped by the masseuse.

You always think that it’ll never happen to you, because you were voted #1 Paranoid and #1 Excessively Cautious by your peers. Because you’re on a holiday. Because you’re not travelling alone. Because, because, because. But to some degree, sexual violation can happen and will happen. Precisely because you’re not a local, you’re expected not to go to the authorities.

On my recent speedboat islands tour in Phuket, I was the target of unwanted attention from one of the local guides. Didn’t help that I travelled with a group either. It started off innocuous. I asked the guide for 7 pieces of snorkeling gear for my mates and I. He then volunteered to find Nemo with me. Assuming that this was just normal Thai hospitality, I accepted his help. Holding my hand while snorkeling apparently wasn’t enough to keep me out of harm’s way. He put my hand over his shoulder. Being underwater and all, I couldn’t quite tell where his other hand was. But I brushed against my own crotch and realized that his hand was there as well. I wasn’t quite sure if it was accidental and I didn’t want to kick up a fuss. So I just dismissed it. A second time I checked, I realized his hand was pressing against my body. By the time I was sure that something was indeed wrong, I swam towards the boat and said I had enough snorkeling. Being the awesome Samaritan that the guide was, he gave me a push up the boat. Needless to say, his hands went where it shouldn’t have, not just shoving at my butt.

Perhaps I should have turned round and yelled at him. Yuut! (Thai for stop, in an ordering manner). Or at least glowered him with a withering look. Even though the situation made me uncomfortable, I could not be 100% sure then that it was not me being overly sensitive. In the aftermath, I did feel outraged by being powerless to stop it from happening. Though no lasting damage was done, it does make me wonder what lessons I can pass on from this unsettling encounter.

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